sun peeking thru snow
On my walk yesterday, I heard an airplane fly by. When I looked up, I saw it was trailing along a massive banner ... “I love you, Marianne”.
This got me thinking.
Did Marianne see this?
How does someone work out the planning of such a romantic gesture?
Does someone leave it to chance that Marianne will look up when that plane flies by?
Does someone need to help Marianne look up?
Does someone need to say to Marianne, hey, listen, at 4pm, make sure to look up at the sky, k?
What if Marianne missed it?
What if she never looked up?
What if she was scrolling FB, got caught up in a conversation or had to go to the bathroom?
What if she saw it and didn’t put two and two together?
What if she’s far-sighted and didn’t have her glasses on at the time?
What if she was picking up a dime?
Then the darker thoughts:
What if Marianne’s lover is all pomp and no substance?
What if they are all splash and all jerk face?
What if the whole affair falls apart within the next few months?
But really I was feeling:
What if I were loved in such an epic way?
And now I ask:
What if I loved myself in such an epic way?
What if I ‘rented a plane’ and had it trail a banner that declared, “I Love You, Alix”? What if I got real bold and real cheeky with it? What epic gesture of self love could I possibly offer myself?
What if I had a solid pee then went for a walk in my hood?
What if I looked up the whole time?
What if I noticed the tree line and the clouds and got to witness
the flight patterns of birds
the details of my neighbours’ rooftops
the nests nestled in autumn branches
the smiling eyes of masked passers by
the beauty of power lines
the curtsy of streetlights
the epic kiss of the wind about my cheeks
the tenderness of breath
Life’s embrace
The gift of getting to live another day and to choose how I live it. To choose love and connection and compassion and kindness and social justice, to advocate for care, to help make this world a safer place for all of us to share. To be the earth’s lover.
To be yours.
I hope Marianne saw that sign. And that she and her lover are swept up in passion’s embrace.
And if that gesture was meant to serve as an embrace as the two of them distance themselves because of this pandemic, I hope it offers them both a heart’s balm.
Today, may I offer you all a massive banner flying from the plane of my heart: “I love you, beautiful humans. Very very much.”